Recently engaged? You’ve probably got a few questions about your wedding ceremony. But don’t worry, we’ve got you covered. From differentiating between religious and civil ceremony vows to tips for choosing your vows, we’ve got everything you need to know about wedding vows right here. Keep reading for more.
Wedding Vows – the Tradition
You must exchange vows for a marriage to be legal. Generally, you can either say the vows yourselves, repeat them after your registrar or clergy member, or say “I do” to them. You’ll normally exchange the rings straight after.
The religious vows we use today in the UK remain largely unchanged from those in the Sarum Rite in Medieval England.
Religious Vows and Civil Ceremony Vows – What’s the Difference?
There are two types of wedding vows; religious and civil ceremony vows. If you want to say religious wedding vows, your ceremony must be in a registered religious building, like a church. However, if you choose to say civil ceremony vows, you’ve got greater venue choices. This way, you can hold the ceremony in a register office or any approved venue.
Something to note is that a civil ceremony must not have any religious references in words or music (read the rules here.) As a result, some of our couples choose to have a small, intimate civil ceremony at Pynes House or the registrar’s office before the wedding begins. This means they can check off the legal aspects of the marriage and use a celebrant to structure their wedding ceremony exactly how they want, with religious references if desired.
READ MORE: The Harper Weddings Guide to Wedding Celebrant Ceremonies in the UK
Examples of Religious Wedding Vows
The main religious wedding vows used in the UK are Church of England and Catholic vows – we’ve included them below.
Church of England Ceremony:
I [Name] take you [Name] to be my wife/husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death us do part, according to God’s holy law. In the presence of God I make this vow.
Catholic Ceremony:
I [Name] take you [Name] to be my wife/husband. I promise to be true to you in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health. I will love you and honour you all the days of my life.
I [Name] take you [Name] for my lawful wife/husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part.
Head over to this blog post for a rundown of traditional wedding vows for Jewish, Hindu, Muslim weddings and more.
READ MORE: What Traditional Wedding Vows Really Mean
Examples of Civil Ceremony Vows
For a civil ceremony, you need to say set vows to make the marriage legal. These set vows are called legal declarations and contracting words – we’ve included them below:
Legal Declarations
Traditional
I do solemnly declare, that I know not of any lawful impediment why I [Name] may not be joined in matrimony to [Name].
Modern
I declare that I know of no legal reason why I [Name] may not be joined in marriage to [Name].
Simplified
The Registrar asks: “Are you [Name] free, lawfully, to marry [Name]?” You reply “I am.”
Contracting Words
Traditional
I call upon these persons, here present, to witness that I [Name] do take thee [Name] to be my lawful wedded wife/husband.
Modern
I [Name], take you [Name] to be my wedded wife/husband.
Simplified
I [Name] take thee [Name] to be my wedded wife/husband.
Choosing between Civil Ceremony Vows and Religious Wedding Vows
At the end of the day, it depends on your personal preferences. Many couples find sentiment in repeating the vows that their ancestors uttered many years ago. However, others prefer to opt for a civil ceremony without religious references because of the greater freedom given around location, music, readings, promises and additional vows.
READ MORE: Some of Our Favourite Non-Religious Wedding Ceremony Readings
Whatever you choose to do, we recommend taking a few evenings to talk through your options and to make a meaningful decision.
At Pynes House, we’re happy to offer civil ceremonies in a number of our beautiful state rooms or even outside in our grounds. Wherever you choose to say your vows, our Devon wedding venue is the perfect place to celebrate, in the picturesque hills of Exeter.
SEE MORE: The Pynes House Gallery
FAQs
Where can I hold a civil ceremony?
The civil ceremony must be held in a register office or an approved venue, like Pynes House. For those who choose to hold it at an approved venue, it’s possible for the whole ceremony to take place outside. For more information, have a look at this gov.uk page.
From the front courtyard to the Drawing Room, we’ve got a wide variety of indoor and outdoor civil ceremony locations at Pynes House. Please get in touch with us to find out more, or see more on our gallery.
Can religious vows be altered?
Religious wedding vows should not be modified, however some couples may choose to add in religious readings, poetry or extracts. Biblical readings can be a great way to do this. Just make sure you discuss your plans with your clergy member because some are stricter than others.
READ MORE: Traditional Religious Wedding Vows – All You Need to Know
What else needs to be said in a religious ceremony?
After exchanging vows, you’ll make ‘Declarations’ which reference God and your commitment to each other. For more information on these Declarations, head over to this website. For a Church of England ceremony timeline, click here.
Whether you’re newly engaged or have been wedding planning for a while, we’ve got plenty of wedding tips and tricks for you on the blog so don’t miss out! We’re also excited to meet with new couples looking for dates in 2023 and 2024, so do get in touch to book a viewing here.